Day 59- Closing a Door and Opening a New One

So last Friday was the last day of my high school career (aside from Graduation and all that jazz)
Also yesterday was the last day of my first job.
I got fired.

Yup. Seems the Fates wanted to wrap up everything all into one. SO I am now jobless and school-less.
Look on the bright side, I have a lot more free time on my hands.

I'm not trying to downplay me getting fired. Yes it was wrong but I think I was more a victim on the system rather than negligence.
Start from the beginning? Ok.
So we have this policy that if you want to give away a shift that you (and the person you're giving that shift away to) have to sign a paper and give it to one of the managers. No big deal right?
BUT this must all be done the day before and handed to the managers in their hand.
It's all very last minute and not really put together.
The person who I was giving my shift to actually maxed out her hours already for working part time (35 hours) I also gave her the sheet to give the manager, so I thought I was covered.

I wasn't.

Long story short, I was fired because it's policy for a "No-call No show"
I don't blame anyone but the stupid system.
So now I just have to find another job. Preferably a waitressing job at a restaurant.
Wish me Luck!

Day 50- Bitter Disappointments

I feel like I'm wasting my time.
Not in the bellydance sense or anything... or the yoga sense.... I'm going great in those fields. I don't even know what I'm talking about

Maybe I should start over. or as "over" as I can since I took a vow not to delete or change anything on my blog (except for spell check so one could understand me)

I'm not going to NYC for college (too expensive), but instead going to a shit little community college... fun fun.
I can't quit my job because it supposed to be financially on the rise. I as going to get a new one I swear.

My precious project of henna-ing for Relay for Life was cancelled due to inclimate weather and we had a 20 minute notice to vacate the facilities.

All this bitching needs a good side though right?
There is!
I found another major in college that I really like, Exercise fitness, and with it I can be a personal trainer among other things.  I plan on getting my Zumba license ASAP. AND Relay for Life is being held again in my town this Friday.... unfortunately it's on the day of my Drama Banquet... But I might not go because of lack of motivation.

My life is actually pretty good right now, things finally seems to be lining up perfectly. I actually am getting a handle on high school life, finding the right friends, making good choices.
Only bad thing is that there's 5 days left.

Is that how the rest of my life is going to be like? Finally figuring things out a second before the end?
Man I hope not.

Maybe I should stop trying to "figure things out" and try to figure myself out. If that makes any sense at all...

My friend got a tattoo today and that got me thinking about my future ink. I've been wanting it for a while now, but was always afraid if it would affect my job, or the future.... like what if I won't like it anymore etc.
But I think it's a keeper, still... I think I'll let it marinate for a while longer.

In yet other news. Finally like a guy and he's going out of state for college. Oh joy.

But let's end on a good note. A Bellydancer who is all tatted up but won't let that stop her:

Rachel Brice!



Day 32- Fighting Forward

So I'm trying to find something news worthy to report...
Nothing really. I found a new Bellydance place and a new class starts up May 3rd so I'm going to check it out and see if I should go or just stick to DVDs... I really hope it's the former so I can get some real live attention to my technique, the perfectionist in me is talking... More like yelling.

There's also a tribal fusion class that's nearby, but I would rather just stick to the "classical/ cabaret" for now and decide what style I want to be later.

In real world news, my dad LOVES Beats Antique.

Oh. PS. I totally missed them in concert in my city.... so pissed when I found out.

No progress towards my costume yet and still learning how to sew.

BUT  I found a VERY inspiring bellydancer. Aziza, you may have heard of her ;)
She is absolutely FAB and I discovered her via the intensive she's doing with Sharon Kihara.... And was promptly dismayed that you have to have at least 3 years experience before being able to go.
It sounded fun...
But alas maybe next time!
Check out her shimmies and her travelling step... ooooer...

Day 24- Putting Together Moves

Okay, so I'm at that point where I have about 20 moves that I know very well....
And I mean VERY! I drill to the point of exhaustion, because I'm a perfectionist like that. I do them on my toes, while I'm walking, doing chores and such things like that.

It is time (Lion King... omg!)

So I'm starting to put together little combo moves to try out and drill together and I want to try to find a song to create a combo for... Maybe a couple. And if I like them well enough, MAYBE (just maybe...) perform them for Relay for life in May.

Now that I have something to work towards, I'm going to be working even harder. I relish the challenge.
ALSO, I found this really cute emerald fabric that I'll use for a bra, dunno about a belt, might not have enough fabric... but who knows.
I'm going to try sewing by hand and see how that goes.
I also ordered Asharah's DVD on Tribal Bellydance and I'm getting a book on sewing beads and sequins on fabric

AHHHHHHH I'm so excited!
More later, as I'm at school,
-Kestrel

Day 19- Respect

Okay, so today there was an "incident" where a person I knew, who is more acquaintance than friend (she's nice but I don't know her that well), found out that another girl (her friend actually) cheated with her boyfriend...

Not explaining this well am I? Person A (my friend) is dating person B... Person B hooks up with person C, person A's friend. Yeah. All three are friends of mine, or at least people I consider friends and hang out with.  Person C's excuse? "oh... she's not my good friend"

REALLY?!?!?

Wow. Even I would do that to my worst enemy. I may hate a person's actions, but I still have respect enough for them as a person. I wouldn't debase myself so much as to become "The Other Woman"

How this all relates to bellydance?

It's all about respecting yourself and others. A bellydancer in good standing wouldn't undercut another by gossiping about other's "poor" skills nor would they try to steal anothers' job or business deal by offering a cheaper price.
If they're new in town then would see where they stand in the Bellydance community rather than barging in and taking over.
Good bellydancers give constructive criticism, not hateful trash talk.
One should also respect oneself and present oneself in a light that encourages good publicity (there IS bad publicity you know).
EXAMPLE Sadie and her scandals that have surfaced: the Taxi Cab Confessions (I shudder when I remember that and promptly feel nauseous) and that Kama Sutra show that got her banned from a BD affair.

I dunno... but it seems I just needed to say this. I shouldn't have to but it needs to be said, unfortunately.

"Love thy Neighbor and thyself"
And this way of life should extend to all aspects of your day.

Okay. Getting off my soapbox now.

Day 11- End of the "Year" Contemplations and Frustrations

Ever been supermega stressed?
I'm feeling that way right now: Doing last minute apps for my backup school, scheduling a chat with he admin coordinator at NYCDA, bellydance, yoga (it helps), papers, school work, tests, homework, a job (soon to be two), making costumes, and Relay for Life.

It all seems to be piling up and seems like my life will be a train wreck pretty soon. I pay taxes now so adults can't complain that to me either. PLUS I have prom to think about.

I complain a lot right now, don't I. But there is a silver lining. I have an awesome family support group (took me like 18 years to find out that they weren't purposefully sabatoging my life...).
That and I have a badass planner, I think I'm going to name him Jesse. Jesse is my hot pink snakeskin print (as in like a digital design print) planner that I've had ALL year. It was one of the first things I've kept and used consistantly, my first good habit.

That good habit is followed by other good ones too, like my consistant yoga and BD workouts and though my reptoire is still limited it's slowing growing.

Now it's time to focus! (again...again)
I promised phoos of my costume and me learning to dye right?
If not, well, here's some awesome photos. I just pinned a bellydance bra with my mom (yay bonding!)

Obviously I still need to sew it on, cut the straps off and replace them. I'm not sure if I want itstrapless (I'm not chesty so I'll be fine) or like a halter? But I already picked out some decorations to make it purdy! Needless to say I'm excited!

wow this photo quality is poor! But I really like how the fabric paint has taken to this, you can definitely see the pattern more clearly now and it still moves and doesn't "crunch"

I'm buying some dye and want to  try different colors and maybe sell some bras later on.

Practicing my water coloring skillz: they're okay.... I bought a book to help me out a bit. The blending is really good (I used two paints) but some areas look "messy sloppy watery" rather than "really beautiful art on fabric watercolor." Thankfully this is on a cheap white bandana that was $1.50 

I will be buying a lot more of that.

but bottom line is that I'm still growing and I love that. I love discovering new things and looking forward to keep writing in here.

oh dear, I've gone all sentiMental.

okay, good night!

-Kestrel

Day 11- Stay Focused and Listen to your parents

Hey,
So I haven't been blogging in a while. I got a little sidetracked with school, college apps and scholarships.
 I want to go to NYCDA and that's a buttload of $$$ so working and applying to stuff is all I can really do.

ANYWAY. With my Bellydancing life, I'm pretty good and I found my upper stomach muscles last night. I can move them (without the lower stomach muscles) everyone and a while. But I'm REALLY excited! It's a huge breakthrough for me.

That beautiful fabric I picked out was to heavy for a skirt or anything useful other than a bra covering and belt and perhaps some arm gaurds which is kind of disappointing because I bought 5 FREAKIN YARDS OF IT!
oh well live and learn. My mom got me some pretty black/white/green fabric for the skirt and helped me pin my first bra! YAY! I'm learning! :P

But I think I know what I'm going to do with the left over fabric. I'm going to make and then sell BD belts and panels. The fabric takes to fabric paint very well (it keeps moving). So I'm going to henna some of it tonight!

I'll post some pictures later since I'm at school right now.
PS sorry for spelling errors!
-Kestrel!